A day just to get through..... 35 was welcomed in in the usual way that new years are around here, almost to the point where it is a family tradition. As with the past couple of years it ended with tears, feelings of worthlessness and a reminder that it is going to be like that year in and year out, no matter what I do..... I am in a place where I give up completely on it.... from now on it is just me... I should be able to get through the days that way.
Today I was happy about:
- Some absolutely lovely birthday wishes from online friends. They brought tears of joy, but also made the hole left by the remainer of the day, the reality hole seem so much bigger.
- Bed. I went to bed by 8pm, no reason to stay up, nothing better to do and glad to have the day over.
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